Archive for the ‘combat’ Category

quick-and-dirty hack for dealing with chronic rudeness

Friday, November 20th, 2009

If you tell a truly inconsiderate person that they’ve been rude, they will sincerely deny it. This is why we call them “inconsiderate”;  they habitually fail to consider or even realize how their actions affect others.

If you respond rudely instead, then over time they will begin to recognize, either consciously or subconciously, the Pavlovian connection between their own inappropriate behavior and your negative response, and they might learn. If they catch on and say, “Why are you being rude? *I didn’t do anything [this time]*,” then you can respond with, “Well neither did I.” ;)

Justification: the truly inconsiderate do not have a respect for the social contract. They live by the “me first” code. Of course, this wouldn’t work if everyone tried it, but even though they’ve been told this, they stoically await tangible proof. Showing these folks what it would be like “if everybody did” provides them with the undeniable scientific proof they seek. (I was quickly cured of my inconsiderate, “me first” thinking by someone who rewarded me in kind of a minor rudeness. It was nothing nasty but I took the lesson to heart and it changed me permanently.) Also, you have no need to fear karma as long as you don’t go above and beyond what is called for, and as long as your rude behavior is calculated to do more good than harm. (Read carefully)

One final note of warning: if you do try to use this technique, have a strategy in place to avoid hours-long discussions about the minute difference between their rude behavior and your negative response, that one, all-important difference that makes their behavior completely acceptable and condemns yours.

Kung Fu

Tuesday, July 28th, 2009

I signed up last night… roughly $400 for 6 months of Kung Fu lessons, “Access to the Facilities”, and a free, jet-black Okinawan Te-style karate uniform (shiny new white belt included) if I sign up today. Seriously… who could resist?

And this is the real deal… I mean, yesterday they were teaching us the 1,000-year-old Qi Gong hygenic art of sloshing saliva around in our mouths. I guess the Chinese believe that this is superior to toothpaste. :P

In other news… Obama is going to Bribe professor Gates with alcohol (turn off scripting error pop-ups)… good luck with that; I’m still waiting for the movie. (What would I call it? The Hunt: Exposing the Racist Nazi Conservative Fascist White Supremist Stinky Pig State OR: The Fall of an American President: How Barack Obama Lost the War With White America)

And finally, Captain Kirk has come back for the whales.

When you start exercising again…

Tuesday, January 13th, 2009

… then you wonder the next day whether you really beat up the punching bag, or it was just your imagination and you were the one who got beat up.

I want to learn Kung-fu

Wednesday, September 3rd, 2008

Daniel: “Where did all these cars come from?”

Miyagi-sensei: “Detroit!”

– the Karate Kid